Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Chapter 2 - Week 18 - Mobile.m4v


Week 18: NO WEIGH IN

So, I decided not to do a weigh in this week. I realized how unhealthy my attachment to the scale can be at times. I realize how if it does not display what I desire, though I am eating well and working out, that I allow it to set a negative tone in my day and my week. I wish I were stronger. I wish I could face the scale and not allow it to have power over me, like I do. Anywho, I know myself and I know I need to back away. I am not backing away from eating well and I am not backing away from exercise. I am just choosing not to allow the scale to control me. This is my life and my future and I am in control (outside of God of course) and as I am fighting to be free from obesity. I don't want to be enslaved to weight loss either. I want to freely embark on a journey to a HEALTHIER ME!!!!!

goal shorts 11/30/2101


Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Who's Report Do You Believe?

I think God allowed/ordained last week to occur for a very specific reason. Let me explain. Two very significant events occurred...

On Wednesday, I was on campus with a couple of friends and we were sitting around just chatting and having a good time. A young man comes walking our direction (and as black people do when we are on a campus where many of us don't exist), we greet him. We begin to have small talk with him and as he is about to leave, he looks at me and says "Bye Gorgeous!"

It totally threw me off. I had to even ask my friend, once he left "did he say what I think he said" and she was like yes, "He called you Gorgeous." That was significant for many reasons...

1. Because I have never been called gorgeous by a man on my first time meeting him and it really struck me as odd before I was even willing to receive it....

2. Because he never seen me or met me before. I point to this because I am so used to people telling me how good I look or how beautiful I am but I can't help to always think they are saying I am pretty or looking good in comparison to "fat liana" but with this dude not so....he simply thought I was beautiful upon meeting me and it meant the world of a difference. He wasn't looking at a progressive Liana that he had seen transform over time. No, he thought the woman sitting directly in front of him was gorgeous as she is and not in comparison. My beauty was not relative to the past me. He saw me for me in that moment.

On Friday, I went out for a friend's birthday. We were going to a show and as we were walking to the show, we encountered a drunk man. The man began to walk with us and harass us. He was pretty scary. Anywho, when we went to redeem our tickets for the show, the man targeted me and began to make fat jokes about me saying how I need to purchase two seats. It really hurt, went deep, brought up pain from childhood and in that moment, I just wanted to be invisible. I felt so small and insecure, fat and undesirable....and it really set the tone for my night. I had to choose to not to allow it to ruin my fun on my friend's birthday because her night mattered to me. So I stuffed the pain, pushed past it and began to to deal with it at another time...

WHY ARE THESE TWO EVENTS MEANINGFUL? Because I can hear the voice of the Lord saying, "Who's Report Do You Believe?" (Isaiah 53:1)...I choose to believe the Report of the Lord!!!...this week has been an example, that the enemy is active & will bring false "reports" my way to get me off track and to believe something other than God's truth!. I had a professor say, "God's mission since the garden of eden has been to correct the lies of the enemy"...He got Adam and Eve with a lie and he often tries to get me with lies as well but I hear the voice of the Lord saying, "WHO'S REPORT WILL YOU BELIEVE, LIANA?"

AND TODAY, I CHOOSE THE REPORT OF THE LORD! I am fearfully and wonderfully made, marvelous are His works and that my soul knows very well...

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Chapter 2 - Week 17

It's been a crazy week!...check out the video.

Chapter 2 - Week 17

So, we are already in to week 17 of Chapter 2 and I am excited. I set out to lose 5lbs this week. I lost 3lbs but I am still happy about my results. I am going for it. My most pressing goal is to be under 200lbs by November 30th and to fit my goal shorts by Nobember 30th so HERE WE GO!!!!

Starting Weight = 356lbs
Weekly Loss = 3lbs
Overal Loss = 132 lbs
Current Weight = 224lbs

look at them guns!!!

goal shorts by 11/30/10

go back and see where i started and look how far i've come!!

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Chapter 2 - Week 16 - Mobile.m4v


CHAPTER 2 - Week 16

I am so excited. Today begins the 2nd leg of my Weight Loss Journey. I call this "Chapter 2". This summer was quite amazing with a loss of 29lbs. I am going for it baby!!! I currently weigh 227lbs so my next major goal is be be 119lbs by November 30th. That means I have 2 1/2 months to loose 28lbs. I can do that. I make have to make some drastic (but healthy) decisions in the way I eat but it is sooooo doable. I have new goal pants, as you can see in the pictures and I am still taking pictures in the bra and shorts until I reach my final goal. It is my prayer that my journey inspires you to go for the "SEEMINGLY IMPOSSIBLE"!!

Starting Weight = 356lbs
Current Weight = 227lbs
Total Loss = 129lbs


Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Week 15- THE CULMINATION OF SUMMER - "believe in possibility"

FINAL SUMMER PHOTOS....it's been good!!!

I can honestly say, "This has been the best summer of my life." When I thought I wanted to be on the Biggest Loser, God had a different plan for me. He wanted to show me that I am strong enough to do this...most of my life I have doubted my own abilities and have often desired a "rescue plan" which is why I applied for the show in the first place....but, as long as I am looking for a rescue plan, I will never slow down long enough to see that God will strengthen me to fight my own battles...It is amazing what can be accomplished in 3 months, one day, one decision at a time...I bought those grey pants in the beginning of 2009 and wanted to fit them by February 2009....and at the beginning of this summer I still could not fit them but I had made up in my mind that I was going to go hard after my dreams and here I am, September 7, 2010 and I rocked those jeans on my birthday, which was my desire at the beginning of this summer. My journey is not complete and I know God has more in store for me but this Summer has made me believe that "impossible" is a mindset not a predetermined reality...so i strive with a drive to conquer every single thing in my life that I told myself I couldn't or I wouldn't do....This is my life and I am going to fight for it....I shouldn't expect someone to do it for me...With God's help, I will SOAR ON WINGS LIKE EAGLES!!!!!